Wonder

Okay. Now back to my real world. I've been dreaming all day long after school. Even when I'm walking back from school. Sometimes, I do wonder. What happen to my mind? My mind seems to dream all day long as long as the teacher's not teaching or doing some exercise.

To the most scary part of it. What would really happen if both of us broke up one day? Would I commit suicide by cutting my own hand again or just decided to jump of a building instead? Which one would be easier? Seriously, I can't imagine my life without him. If I would be the one who ask for break-up, he could die, I guess. But, if he's the one. No doubts are needed. For sure, I would die. I'm damn sure bout this, somehow.

Before this, I was still asking Brenda, who's sitting next to me in class. How long would both of us last? She said it would definitely be longer than our friends relationship which we would say it like a shit. Don't ask me why we called it shit, as the reason is pretty obvious. Because it is really SHIT. That's bout it. But, I did always bare in mind that, I'm not going to take him as my forever yet. Not so soon. There's still plenty of time for me to understand him, if I would like to.

Brenda also said that 'the more you afraid of that something, the lesser the chance that little something would happen. It's kinda true somehow. I believe it, just by the way I would rather it to be. No influence by whoever. Let's pray that he would really change my thoughts on everything and also the way I look at things, later in the future.

Sincerely.

yenn :)